Friday, November 19, 2010

Give Up

I recently got an e-mail from an entrepreneur I work with that said she chose to give up on her idea. I immediately hit "reply," starting a letter with a bunch of motivational, "never give up" stuff. But then I paused, deleted, and thought, "you go girl."

Ever stay in a relationship or job way longer than you should have? I have. Why? Because I thought I could do it, win it, conquer it, transform it, make it right, change myself, change the other, whatever it was - I was up to the challenge. And if I gave up - than that meant I was a failure. But that's bull-shit.

Think about the words, "Give UP." "Give" is an offering. "Up" is positive. If you are considering releasing something that no longer serves you - don't berate yourself as a "loser" or a "quitter" because you gave up. Instead, consider yourself brave for making a choice to release that which is no longer serving you.

Let's give up "Never give up" as the heroic path.

Here's my BUT. What I gave up were executions or expressions of what I thought I wanted. I didn't give up on my dreams. There's a fine tricky line. I'm considering doing a talk or workshop around this. Would be interested in your stories or thoughts around giving up.

Much love,


  1. This came at just the right time for me. Thanks.

  2. I do like your notion of giving up - how it is liberating rather than confining; it opens doors rather than closing them. There is a huge sense of disappointment at "giving up" and yet it allows us to use time and energy for other things that are probably more important and potentially more fruitful. I think it's a great topic for a blog post / presentation / TED talk! (Yes, I really want you to get to TED!!!)

  3. Stella,

    Your perspective on this topic, that so many people struggle with, is purely refined and empowering. You elucidate the true truth about giving up and identify that very tricky line which people need to be able to distinguish.
    This is a phenomenal piece, and a stupendous idea for a workshop/lecture topic!
    In your own words, "You GO GIRL!"


  4. Emily and Lisa,
    Thank you for your beautiful words, support, and validation. This makes me feel heard and encourages me to take this to the next level.